How to Overcome Adversity and Create Outstanding Results in Life and Work

View PDF | Print View
by: Guest
Total views: 619
Word Count: 908
Date: Sat, 3 Jun 2006 Time: 12:00 AM
0 comments

Learning to overcome adversity helps you produce great
results--in life, work, and relationships--even when the going is
tough.

After just one day of adversity response training, elite NCAA
swimmers improved both their ability to bounce back after a set
back, and swam significantly faster.

After similar programs, realtors increased their sales by 250% to
320%!

Life insurance sales people nearly doubled their effectiveness!

Couples and team members who practice adversity coping skills
report better communication and cooperation—and more fun
together!

Clearly, resilience and the ability to cope with adversity give
you an edge.


RESILIENCE IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY

Resilience, the ability to cope with adversity, will be prized in
years to come.

A poll of 20,000 people worldwide reveals that 98% predict a more
difficult, changing, even chaotic future.  Individuals, families,
organizations, and businesses all face accelerating change and
increasing levels of adversity.

We are naturally resilient.  We have the potential to bounce back
from setbacks.  But, we lose it over time.  And, when adversity
stacks up on us, we get rigid, less flexible, less able to bounce
back.

But we can increase our ability to overcome adversity and produce
great results—even in difficult circumstances.

Learning to cope with failure and adversity can make us
successful, now, and in the future.


LEARNING FROM FAILURE

Learning to deal productively with failure is key to building
resilience.

"Suppose you have tried and failed again and again," said
actress Mary Pickford.  "You may have a fresh start any moment
you choose, for this thing that we call failure is not the
falling down, but the staying down."

Pickford makes an important distinction.

There is a critical difference between the act of failing and
conclusions you draw about that act.

Those who stay down judge they, themselves, have failed, not just
their actions.

Moreover, they generalize from their "failures" to illogical
conclusions such as,
"I am a failure," and "I will probably always fail."

Therefore, they assume there is no point in getting up.

But there is always a point in getting up.

Old wisdom says the sooner we make our first 5000 mistakes, the
sooner we will learn anything.

New wisdom talks about "rapid prototyping"—fail fast, and
often.

Make many small, instructive mistakes.  Try, try again.  That is
how you learn quickly, in art, business, and life.  It is also
the fast track to success.


OWNING THE RESULTS YOU WANT

To cope well with adversity, it is important to stifle the
tendency to blame yourself, circumstances, or other people.

Don't focus on the adversity and why it happened.

Instead, focus on the results you want—in spite of the
adversity—and ask yourself these kinds of questions.

 * Do I want this result?  Is it worth working for?

 * What actions can I take to make it happen?

The origin of the adversity is not as important as owning the
results you want, in spite of who or what caused the adversity.

You get more power if you "choose" the results you want.  Try
this:

Say to yourself, "I choose to…" and then add a result you
want.

Notice how making a choice shifts how you feel.

People usually report that choosing results empowers them.  It
gives them a clear sense of direction, and commitment to their
result.


WATCH YOUR SELF-TALK

Watching your self-talk means becoming aware of the stream of
chatter that runs through your mind, often without you noticing
it.

Psychologists call it roof brain chatter, ticker tape talk, or
gremlin thoughts.

Whatever you call it, self-talk is the almost constant flow of
thoughts, beliefs, stories, judgments, and conclusions you tell
yourself.

We usually don't know we're doing it.  And we do not realize
how much it affects our moods and actions.  But we chatter away
to ourselves about our lives, our actions, other people and their
actions, and what happens to us.

We also make judgments about what happens, and about what we
think we (or they) shoulda, coulda, or woulda" done, and so on.

Unfortunately, this nattering happens mostly outside our
awareness.

So, the first step in building resilience is to notice your self
talk, and make it more supportive.

Self-talk affects your moods and emotions, and your actions are
motivated by your emotions.  "Emote," means, "to move.

Unmonitored, self-talk and the emotions it generates, move you in
ways you don't want to move.  But changing your self-talk
changes your actions—and results!

If you make a call and are rejected, your self-talk might sound
like this: "I screwed up.  I'm no good at this.  I'll never
get it right.  What's the point?"

Does such talk get you pumped for the next call?  Not likely!

So catch negative chatter and change it.

Say something like,"Okay, that didn't go the way I wanted.
Next time, I will emphasize benefits before I describe features.
Besides, it's just one call.  On to the next one."


CREATING SUCCESS IN SPITE OF ADVERSITY

If adversity knocks you down, get up.  Most of success is found
is in getting up and keeping going--in spite of difficulties,
problems, and circumstances.

Success guru Napoleon Hill say: "Every adversity, every failure,
every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater
benefit."

Learning to learn from failure, taking ownership for results you
want, and making sure your self-talk supports success will help
you create the results you most want—regardless of the adversity
you face.

------------------------
Adapted from the ebook Emotional Mastery: Manage Your Moods and
Create What Matters Most – With Whatever Life Gives You!  by
Bruce Elkin.

About the Author

Bruce Elkin is a writer, coach, and consultant who helps
individuals and organizations create what matters most-in spite
of problems, circumstances, and adversity.  His ebook Emotional
Mastery: Manage Your Moods and Create What Matters Most-With
Whatever Life Gives You is available on his website at:
http://www.BruceElkin.com.

---

Rating: Not yet rated

--Choose-- 0 1 2 3 4 5

Comments

Add Comment

You do not have permission to comment. If you log in, you may be able to comment.

Recommend This Page To A Friend!