Lost in a World of Confusion

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Children need to develop critical thinking skills to make decisions about what they accept to be right or wrong, fact or fiction, based upon their ability to weigh the evidence of situations and come to the truth about what is occurring. Children who are forced to comply with situations that make them compromise their values or morals will foster codependency. The child will lose the ability to see the clear violation of their moral code and will begin to show a moral relativism that dictates there is no clear right or wrong in their lives. Through heavy dosages of medication and threatening stances by parents, most children can be forced to submit to the requests of their parents. I believe there will be major consequences for these children later in life when they attempt to develop relationships with others. Their basis for relationships will be grounded in lies, force, and threats.

Jamal is a 5-year old boy who is very inquisitive about things he discovers in life. He likes to know about cause and effect and how the world has come to be like it is. He is a respectful young man who has learned some basic rights and wrongs. He knows that you should not hit or make fun of people. His kindergarten teacher is very upset with Jamal for asking too many questions about the rules of her classroom. He has questioned rules concerning not being able to use the restrooms during class and raising his hand to talk. Jamal stated that he did not understand why kids could not use the bathroom when they had to go or why the teacher let others talk without raising their hand sometimes. He also asked why he was asked to stop running outside when he was told he was allowed to play tag during recess. The teacher told Jamal he was very defiant and oppositional. Jamal did not understand why he was in trouble for his actions. The teacher recommended that Jamal been seen by a psychiatrist and placed on medication for his hyperactivity and defiance.

Many times, children are thought as defiant when they just want to know the rules to the world they live. When the rules do not make sense to them or are inconsistent, children can become very insecure. Many children will wait for the adult figure to tell them how to think, feel, and act to avoid conflict. Others will become frustrated and act out. Children need to understand a consistent set of standards grounded in fairness. This can be achieved with a program where behavior expectations are spelled out objectively and followed by all including the adults.

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